Lost

Dear Madison, 

Where have you gone?

Who have you become? 

When will the real  you come home?

How can I find you?

You see it is simple you stay close to the ones that love you and do the things you know you love. You put yourself out there even if it means getting hurt and having a few bad days. You exit out of that protective cement wall you have around you and  you do something good for the soul. Maybe work out? Maybe read a good book? Or maybe someday you will break through that cement wall that surrounds you and allow another person in. Until that day keep living, keep dreaming, keep trying, keep being the best you, you know how to be. 

*why is it so much easier said than done?
xoxo

Someday

Dear Miss Madi,

Some day when you become a misses

will you  make sure your mister has a

sense of humor,

belives the same things you do,

loves everything about you even the bad,

allows you to talk about yourself,

tells you everything about himself even the bad,

has the same standards as you,

has a desire to entertain with you,

loves eating and good food,

watching the olympics,

being lazy,

and

make sure he calls you back especially after you call him.

xoxo yours truly

name game and name issues

so i have this thing for names. no not like some people i am not going to name my children after the country or city where they were conceived. or name them differnet fruits or bible names. in fact my thing for names has nothing to do with the names of my future children.

my name thing doesn't even have to do with personal nicknames for my friends. my name issue if you will is the need to name my different groups of friends in my life. weird i totally know. i don't know where it came from but i do know i can identify the different groups of friends through out my life by the group name i bestowed upon them.

in the beginning there was the unofficial fantastic four 

 

(me, em, regan, and kelli prom 07 although the group was in its most unofficial state in 2005)

then there was the very official mr. triple k it began and ended sophomore year of high school  (notice how it is triple k and kkk we were trying to be politically correct)

 

(madison (me), rach, kara, kelli, kenzie)

 

(mr.triple k at my 16th bday lunch)

the summer after sophomore year mr. triple k transformed into the fab four i mean come on it was high school we had to add some testerone to the group (please notice the four repeat)

 

(me, mike cam and kelli) 

*you can read more about these lovely besties here

all good things must come to an end like missions and graduation and somewhere along the way all my favorite ladies came together and we created the legit six

 

(me,em, regan, kay, kelli, kara kelli's bridal shower fall 09)

 

(our very legit birthday dinners fall 08)

 

(senior trip to dinsey land summer 08)

 

(senior prom i look horrible so please just let it be)

 

(our first truly legit trip sunshine tournament spring 08)

*ok so i like these girls alot and we take tons of pictures

high school ended and college came and a year later the legit six grew in size by adding three husbands to the mix. i moved to liberty square this past fall and i met these classy ladies you see bre and andrea live next door so they couldn't be the roomies. so i refer to them as the sudo roomies.

 

(bre, andrea, me and lauren sledding winter 09)

 

(incomplete but partial sudo halloween) 

now do not think that i do not realize that by giving my friends  group names i do not realize that i am being exclusive i totally realize this. i am sorry, that is why i fully admit i have name issues. someday i know i will have all my best friends together in one big group but until then i am grateful for all the fun names i have to remember them by. i also realize that someday i will have the ultimate name for my very best friend and that name will be husband (or hubby, babe, hot stuff, ect).

remember?

 these boys? 

(pic taken from fbook can i comment on how great he looks?)

well this one came home yesterday...

kay and her hubby and i are surprising him tonight. 

where does the time go?

balance?

Dear Madison (Madi), 
Sometimes I feel as if life is overwhelming. That I do everything that I think will make me happy and yet it just seems to fall short. Why do I often focus on one aspect of my life and let it consume me? 

Balance is the key. Balance is what I am constantly telling myself, "Once i find balance in life everything else will work itself out." Life is not so. If we could find balance in life we would not have political debates or may I dare say we could even have world peace? 

So today I am not striving for balance. Today and this week I am striving for understanding. Understanding of how balance can become obtainable in my own life. So for today I am going to do the things I have to do and maybe even some of the things I don't want to do all in the pursuit of balance. Wish me luck. Please?

Dear Madi?

 (enlarge and you will see that even Calvin loves a good Dear Abby)

So in the seventh grade I totally took band. I have no idea why? OK so maybe I do. You see one of my older brother's friends was in the band. He played the saxophone and I thought he was a total babe. So naturally I joined the band. When people asked me what I played I had to be honest with them and myself and would often times say "I was really good at looking at the flute." I never practiced and often times would purposefully leave my flute at home so i didn't have to play in school or at school so I didn't have to practice. Yet when we weren't playing our instruments band was my favorite class. 

My teacher was like so cool or so the 7th grade me thought. He would talk to us and treat us as if we were real people not these tweens. He would ask our advice and actually want to hear us out. I loved talking to him. You gotta understand that I was an avid Oprah viewer. So naturally I knew really random facts about everything. My teacher LOVED this. He loved it so much that he thought I should be like a Dear Abby for my school's newspaper. Only problem? I wasn't in the 9th grade. 

Unfortunately I never pursued this idea in the 9th grade probably because I was too busy being obsessed with clothes, the "steps" and whatever else  freshman obsess over. Then in high school I'm pretty sure I was obsessed with clothes, boys, and working two jobs. I never got around to writing for the school newspaper and obtaining my 7th grade dream of being a Dear Madi columnist. This dream in fact was almost all but forgotten until last night when talking to the roomies and reading them my blog out loud (why I couldn't just tell them what I had written I have NO idea) they told me I should actually have my own advice column. How cool would that be? I mean I love giving people advice or at least pretending I have something to say that could be of worth to them.

So as of today I am going to be Dear Madi. If only for questions in my own life.I mean everyone has dreams (that may or may not have began during seventh grade band) and I am going to allow one of my many dreams to come true right here on this little blog. 

 

(just waiting for my dreams to come true and thinking up some great advice to help myself out)

i totally did

As my contribution to the BYU 132nd ward I made this flier 

HAS YOUR WEEK END BEEN A LET DOWN?

DO YOU HAVE A STRESSFUL WEEK AHEAD OF YOU?

HAVE YOU BEEN SEARCHING FOR THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE?

IF YOU ANSWERED YES TO ONE OR MORE OF THESE QUESTIONS…

YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO THE

132ND WARD

SUNDAY SOCIAL

TIME: 9 PM

WHERE: YORKTOWN 7

WHAT: MUNCHIN AND MINGLING

Highlights of Previously mentioned Sunday Social

• boys of Yorktown 7 were unaware of the pending party until flier was posted
• over 100 cupcakes were made by yours truly
  
• player corner was introduced (seriously who do these guys think they are?)
  
• raptor fighting was to be had (gotta love singles ward floor play)
  
• potential dates were found
  
• valentines were made
  
• hearts were broken
  
• more mingling than munchin was happening
  
• all in all i would say weekend expectations were finally met and singles ward rumors spread

sunday dinners, la familia and gossip

 (la familia at the annual Arlington christmas party)

Sunday is a special day. It is the most important day of the week. I consider my Sunday's to be sacred. I consider them to be different than every other day of the week. My Sunday's are about family, good food, hot gossip, dating 101, flirty desserty and oh yeah church too. 

Sunday dinners have been around for as long as we have had the day off. As mormon's and Call's we have very little option in which vices we choose to take part in. So we have chosen to eat rum cake as opposed to the drinking of rum. We have chosen indulging ourselves with the best mexican food, steak, salmon, guacamole, ribs, salad, rolls, and pasta rather than placing money on the big game. We choose to arouse ourselves through over eating and sugar comas rather than "opening the present before Christmas" (just imagine my 80 year old grandpa explaining this to the newly engaged).

With many young single adults (mostly male) joining us for our sacred Sunday dinners these Sunday dinners have become somewhat of a dating how to or dating how to not. I mean it is the day after Saturday. It is the weekend coming to an end, who better to analyze the post date text with than members of  your own family.  Often times it is very educating to be the only single girl at the table. I now realize that sometimes a guy might get your number on Monday, hang out with you Tuesday, ask you out for Friday on Wednesday and be over you by Thursday. Seriously.

I  have learned much more than just how to set a table, bake, bbq, and do the dishes at Sunday dinner. I have learned to lie through my teeth about what really went on the previous weekend. I have learned to always be temple worthy while sitting by Dad, Grandpa and Grandmother because you never know when you will get the worthiness interview in front of everyone. I have come to realize that it is not enough to be into someone you need to be pursuing them, along with keeping your options open. You need to be able to hold your own while mingling but if your too good you will be put in the "she's not interested" category. You need to master the line between taking home to meet the parents sweet and just boring.  I am telling you it really is a game. The dating game.

I am just lucky enough to learn majority of my plays, and rules while enjoying Sunday dinner.

 

(some of la familia skydiving together + elliots lady friend)

 

(la familia at lisey's campfire birthday party with some of my besties em and rach)

 

(putting some of those dating game plays to work in a fall la familia group date)

I've had a Day

one of my favorite movies is one fine day i love how absolutely nothing goes right for them. at one point michelle phiefer says to george clooney "i have a day ahead of me". one of my besties kara would always use that phrase in high school (you see she is the one who introduced me to one fine day i believe it was my 9th birthday she gave me the soundtrack and guess what? i fell in love) naturally i started to adapt the phrase into my own vocabulary. so even though i did not have "a day ahead of me" it turned into a day.

a day where nothing seemed to go right. everything i did iwas just wrong. today i was off. does that make any sense? i hope it does. 

because that would mean i am not the only one who ended her day at her parent's house, in her mom's jim jams and promised herself that tomorrow i will be happy, tomorrow i will be in control, tomorrow i will get things done, but tonight i am just going to be. be with my hopes and dreams for a better tomorrow. sweet dreams.

something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue

as of july 2009 i have been in 6 weddings and counting

my life has been consumed with my dear friends and family getting married.

i have gone from a wedding virgin to a wedding expert in a mere half a year.

my new favorite show is "say yes to the dress"

i can throw a bachelorette party with out a sweat

although bridal showers are my forte.

due to process of elimination i have planned my whole wedding...

dancing: 

yes

dj: 

no way

live band: 

always

dessert buffet:

no

extraordinary dinner: 

a must

line: 

no way

fab dress, hair and make up: 

absolutely (it is my day after all!)

bridesmaids: 

maybe

brothers dancing: 

an absolute yes

wedding video montage: 

already compiling my pics

first dance:

started practices last week 

groom:

fabulously handsome, funny and genuine

date: 

not until i find previously mentioned groom and fall in love

(a girl can dream though...right?) 

 

*just a few of the wedding dinners, bridal showers, wedding open houses, bachelorette parties, garden parties, wedding receptions, and my favorite temple exits

my person

last night i was talking to my favorite single older brother. 

we are at the same point in our lives. 

single, working, going to school, wanting adventure, looking for love, finding ourselves, making good habits and analyzing every situation. 

i love talking to this older brother of mine. 

not just because we are going through many of the same life altering decisions

but because he gets me. 

he knows me 

and guess what?

he still likes me. 

he doesn't care that i have made him more mad than any human being ever. 

he does not care that i don't answer his phone calls, texts, i fall asleep while he is talking to me and hang up just because i'm not in a good mood,

he doesn't care if i have makeup on or my hair is done...in fact he never even notices either way.

he doesn't care if i have made past mistakes.

what he does care about is that i am nice, honest, loving, hard working, true to my self 

and most of all

he cares that i am happy. 

we all deserve people like this in our life. 

so thank you ALEX for being my person 

even if it is just until we each find the one.

(august 2006 before he left for england)

(80's dancing winter 2009)

confusion...

as the author and sole contributor of this blog i have a confession. 

i have no idea what this blog is really about. 

at first it was about the "material" 

but then i realized my "material" was mostly about others

so...

in order to stop my oh so bad habit of gossiping 

this blog is in confusion. 

there is no real purpose to me blogging 

but 

yet i love it.

i think it is because it reminds me of how 

blessed, 

grateful,

fabulous, 

incredible, 

loving, 

and

fun 

my life really is.

Love?

i don't know exactly what love is...

i know i love my friends,

and 

my family,

i know i love my frye boots,

and my car

i know i love my roommates and sudo roommates,

i know i love eating and cooking,

i know i love clothes and shopping,

but 

i do not know what it is like to fall in love. 

but i hear it is magical. 

i can't wait to experience the magic,

oh and have a valentine.